Can you believe that house? The two types of house shaming and why we shouldn’t

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Jennifer Juliano, REALTOR®<br />Keller Williams Realty<br />Boston-MetroWest<br />Member: KW Luxury Homes<br />Mobile: (508) 294-0778<br />I’ll Make It Happen.<br />You’ll Make It Home.

Jennifer Juliano, REALTOR®
Keller Williams Realty
Boston-MetroWest
Member: KW Luxury Homes
Mobile: (508) 294-0778
I’ll Make It Happen.
You’ll Make It Home.

By Jennifer Juliano

Imagine driving in your car, your thoughts drifting to your errands, when something catches your eye: the sun reflecting off a broken window of a house you’ve never noticed before, hidden behind overgrown brush. Or perhaps it’s the lonely house on your street, long uninhabited, devoid of signs of life. Then there’s the home in poor condition where people still live. Possibly it’s a newer home, larger in size than what you have and in excellent condition. Both types of houses can elicit different reactions from people depending on their unconscious bias or Life’s experiences.

Many thoughts may cross your mind: “How could someone let it get this bad? What kind of people are they? I would never!” Owning a home is part of the American dream—a place to take pride in and create memories. So why do some homes, once full of promise, fall into disrepair? As for the good condition, some find themselves scoffing at their size and possible market values.

There are countless reasons a house can fall into disrepair; it can happen to anyone. It’s important not to judge or shame those who struggle; we all have challenges that may not be visible. Perhaps the owners faced an unexpected financial crisis, making essential needs like food and utilities a priority over home repairs. Physical or mental disabilities may prevent property maintenance. Responsibilities, like caring for aging parents, take precedence over landscaping. Additionally, not everyone possesses the skills necessary for home upkeep. Others feel pressure to keep up with an image, and sometimes at the cost of their own peace or wallet.

Legal issues can complicate matters. When a homeowner passes away, the house may be tied up in probate or left unattended. Family members move away with new lives. In cases of reverse mortgages, or if the home’s condition deteriorates, its value declines, leading to further complications. Owners might feel embarrassed or depressed, making asking for help difficult. Rental properties can suffer from neglect, either from carelessness of the tenants or landlords unable to make necessary repairs.

Homeowners or their remaining families are often well-aware of their property’s condition; they don’t need others to remind them, especially through social media. While we can only assist those willing to accept help, being good neighbors can make a difference. One neighbor I know mowed the lawn of an vacant house nearby, once owned by a single, elderly woman who had passed away. This small act kept it from becoming a target for vandalism while probate was sorted out and kept it looking presentable.

Conversely, we also face criticism over conspicuous consumption. What one person sees as a “large” house might be another’s dream. One homeowner I know lives in what some label a “McMansion.” They grew up in public housing and, through years of hard work and sacrifice, eventually purchased a home in the suburbs. Despite their transition out of poverty, they sometimes face judgment for their success.

Housing choices are subjective, reflecting personal budgets and comfort levels. The next time you see a house in disrepair or one that seems overly extravagant for your own taste, pause. Can you offer assistance, or can you rather simply wish the owners well? Celebrate the achievements of others, recognizing the struggles they might have overcome to reach their goals that you may never know of.

There’s a saying I love: “Don’t look down on someone unless you are helping them up.” This perspective can foster understanding and kindness in our communities. Instead of passing judgment, let’s strive to be supportive, recognizing that everyone has their own story, including you.

Can you believe that house? The two types of house shaming and why we shouldn’t

Can you believe that house? The two types of house shaming and why we shouldn’t

 

 

 

 

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